A Little Whine With Dinner. Sally Bahnsen 2 Nov 1999 Disclaimer: Mulder and Scully belong to CC. They sure are fun to borrow though. Thankyou for lending them to me, it was very therapeutic. Authors notes: I guess I better dedicate this to my husband who recently spent the week home from work suffering from a chest infection and certainly inspired me to write this. All you wives out there will know what I mean. Thankyou to Donna for beta reading and Vickie for help with the title, beta reading and formatting. My knightesses in shining armour. Thanks heaps! Rating: PG 13 - for bad language, not the kind of stuff I'd want my kids to read or use.(Naughty mother!) Category-MT, H. Archive anywhere that it hasn't already gone to. Better keep my name and address on it. I don't think anyone else will want to blamed for this. Spoilers- Brief reference to EBE Summary: What if Mulder was a real man and lived in the real world? Would he really hide his injuries and illnesses from Scully? A Little Whine With Dinner by Sally Bahnsen ********************* There was no way he could do this alone. Nope! No way in the world. There were a lot of things a man could do by himself, he knew that. How many times had he completed the Sunday morning crossword while sitting on the john? ....Alone. And that wonderful rush of adrenalin, the release of endorphins, this could only be achieved while sharing the company of one's own self during a late night run. But this? No way! He just had to share. Mulder reclined his body and sunk deep into the cushions on Scully's sofa. He dropped his head back and closed his eyes. It's not a good idea to lay everything on the line at once. You've gotta build up to it. Drop the odd hint or remark. Work up slowly to the really serious stuff. Of course sometimes the subtle approach doesn't always work, you have to be a little more direct, make sure the person understands in no uncertain terms what is going on. Slowly, Mulder lifted an eyelid and stole a glance at his partner. His partner whose head was buried in a file, totally oblivious to his current dilemma. Should he break her concentration and confess all, or just show her, make her realize how he was feeling? But...before he could finish his argument with himself the decision was taken out of his hands. It was just a tickle at first, irritating the inside of his nose. Then the pressure started to build and before he knew what had happened his face exploded with an almighty sneeze. Wow Mulder. That has to be a personal best! No improvisation, just an all natural sneeze that he had achieved quite by accident. He wiped the droplets of saliva and mucous down the leg of his jeans and peered up at Scully through watery eyes to gauge her reaction. What the...? She was still glued to the file, not even a twitch! How could she have not have heard THAT sneeze? He'd given it his best shot without even trying. Was he losing his touch? Mulder rubbed at his forehead, groaning. Then waited. "Sorry Mulder did you say something?" Scully asked absentmindedly, her gaze never leaving the contents of the file. A pen tapped against her teeth as she frowned in concentration. "You know, Mulder, this case is fascinating. Have you ever considered..." She was cut off in mid sentence as her attention was grabbed by the sound of her partner coughing and spluttering. "My God Mulder are you okay?" She rose from her seat and went to Mulder's side, giving him two hearty slaps on the back in an effort to abate the coughing fit that seemed to have him in it's grip. Finally. It was only a matter of choking to death before she noticed! "Im sick." He stated pitifully as he struggled to get himself under control. "No shit sherlock. I told you to go get out of your wet clothes sooner. Any idiot that goes down to the police station to get a statement after falling in a creek and getting soaking wet in near freezing temperatures deserves all they get!" Hmmm. This wasn't right. He was beginning to regret drawing this kind of attention to himself. Obviously she wasn't taking his pedicament seriously. "So sorry Scully. I'll just take my idiotic flu germs out of here and go home" He went to get up when he realized a headache had started to build. God was he really expected to drive home in this condition? Maybe, just maybe...... He stood up quickly and YES! Beautiful. The gray mist started swirling in. He teetered slowly to the right and then a little to the left, back to the right. Shit come on Scully, surely you are not going to let me hit the ground. AAh, there you are. He felt her hand grip his arm and push him back into the sofa. "Mulder sit down. You are not going anywhere." God he loved it when a plan came together. Scully eased Mulder back into the sofa and felt his forehead for a fever. "Hmm. A little warm but not really enough to make you dizzy. Do you have a headache?" Scully asked as she straightened. Now that's more like it. She just needed a little prod to get her attention focused back on him. "God Scully it's a blinder. Would you mind dimming the lights a little, they're hurting my eyes." He'd had so much practice at getting just the right inflexion into his voice to ignite Scully's concern. Now it was just a matter of sitting back and letting it happen. Scully turned the lights down and came to sit by Mulder. "How's that, better?" She asked. "MMmm, thanks. Scully? Would you have an aspirin or something?" "Hang on Mulder I'll go check." She returned a few minutes later with a white tablet and a glass of juice. "If you're coming down with a cold I think this will be better than an aspirin. I found some cold and flu capsules." she handed Mulder the pill and the glass, he swallowed it down wincing as he realized his throat was sore too. "Why don't you rest and I'll fix you something to eat. It's not a good idea to take those things on an empty stomach." "Thanks, but I don't know if I'm up to eating anything." I am so good at this he thought, look at that expression of worry on her face. "Yeah well I think you should try anyway. You rest and I'll call you in a little while." Twenty minutes later ********************* "Mulder, soup's ready." Scully waited but there was no response. She returned to the lounge room and found him sleeping peacefully on the sofa. She wondered if she should let him be, but the thought of the consequences if the flu pill upset his stomach forced her to wake him. "Come on Mulder, wake up, you need to eat something." "Huh, what? Scully. God Scully I feel like shit. I don't think I can make it to the table. Could I eat it here?" Why leave a nice warm, comfortable sofa to go sit on a hard wooden chair? He might be sick but he wasn't crazy. "Mulder." Oh oh. Had he pushed his luck? That 'Mulder' was a little too stern for his liking. Better add a little something to convince her that he should stay where he was. As he wracked his brains for something brilliant his body took over for him and he was seized in a very severe, very painful rib breaking coughing fit. Shit! Maybe he was sicker than even HE thought. "Mulder sit up straight. Here take a sip of this juice." Scully held him upright and handed him the glass of juice left over from his medication. The coughing subsided as he sucked in great wheezing breaths of air. A minute more and he was back to normal. "Are you okay now?" "Yeah I think so. I think I need to see a doctor." "Mulder I'M a doctor." Scully replied. "No, I mean a REAL doctor. Scully you practice on dead people. The way I feel now, if I don't see a doctor soon you might get your chance." "Mulder! After all these years you're doubting my ability to take care of you?" Scully was beginning to wonder just where the hell he was coming from. "No it's not that. It's just that..I think I'm REALLY sick." "I know Mulder. I've seen you sick before. You need rest and if you are worse in the morning then I will drive you down to the emergency room." Why was she speaking to him through clenched teeth? All he wanted was some decent medical care. He trusted Scully, but that last coughing fit had frightened him. It was a little more than even he had bargained for. But it was looking kinda cold and miserable outside. Perhaps spending the night here with Scully was the more sensible option. She was looking pretty pissed, better try and win back some brownie points. "I'm sorry . It's just that I couldn't breathe and it had me worried." "You know I trust you." The pout, try the pout. He looked at her with soulful eyes and the bottom lip stuck out for good measure. The anger visibly drained away from Scully's face and was replaced with a smile. "Mulder spend the night here so I can keep an eye on you. I promise if you get worse we'll head straight for the emergency room. Now come and have something to eat." Way to go Scully! ***************************************** "Scully this soup tastes weird. Does it taste weird to you?" Mulder swirled the spoon through the bowl of soup and then lifted it to his nose and sniffed. "Smells strange too." "Tastes fine to me." Scully replied scooping another spoonful into her mouth. "No, I think it's off." Mulder lifted the bowl up and tipped it to one side then the other, sloshing some of the soup over the edge and onto the table. "Mulder what the hell are you doing?" A sick Mulder was one thing but this was threatening to drive her to the point of desperation or suicide or even more tempting......MURDER! "I'm trying to see what's making the soup taste and smell so weird." "The soup is fine. It is probably your cold or the medication or BOTH affecting your taste buds. Now, eat it!" Clenched teeth again. Maybe she has a toothache and that's what's making her so cranky. But even so, can't she see how sick I am. Is it too much to ask for a little sympathy and understanding. Hmmph, I'll eat the damn soup if it'll make her happy. He placed the bowl back on the table but as he did he knocked the spoon off the edge of the table and sent it tumbling to the floor, splattering soup over the table cloth and himself. Shit. He looked at Scully who in turn glared back at him. God, does she expect ME to pick up that spoon? She knows how sick I am, the drop in altitude will probably set my head spinning and my stomach......Yes, judging by THAT look she does expect me to pick it up. O-kaaay. Mulder ducked under the table to retrieve his spoon. The timing couldn't have been better. Just as his head made it under the table an enormous sneeeze erupted. It slammed his head into the underside of the table and sent a searing pain shooting up his back. 'AAARRRHHHH FUCK!!" He dropped to the floor. One hand rubbing the point of contact on his head, the other trying in vain to reach the stabbing, unyeilding pain in his back. "Shit, shit, shit. Aaarh Fuck!" He knew he wasn't winning any awards for creative language but shit this HAD to be the worst pain he had ever felt. "Mulder what happened, are you all right?" Scully knelt at his side trying see the damage to his head. "No I am not all right." He ground out. "Let me see your head." Scully pulled his fingers away from the back of his head. No blood and not much of a bump really. This was overplay even for him. "My back, God Scully, someone's sticking a knife in my back. I'm dying here." He whined from the floor. She tried to suppress a grin, she really did. Poor Mulder nothing was ever simple for him. It didn't take Einstein to figure out this diagnosis. "Mulder I want you to try and relax. I think you might have pulled a muscle when you sneezed. Take it easy and the pain should die down in a few minutes then we'll get you off the floor and onto the sofa." Ever calm, ever cool, Scully was able to talk her partner through the worst of the pain. "Are you ready? Lean one hand on the chair, I'm going to hold your other arm and together we're gonna get you off the floor. Do you think you can manage?" Scully asked as she manoeuvred herself into a position to help support him. "Yes, yes I'm ready." He knew he shouldn't have left the sofa in the first place. "Okay. Lift." "AArrhhh. Shit. Aarh, arh! OW!" It was a series of cursing and groaning. "HEY! A little less yelp and a little more help here Mulder. Now lift, come on, get your legs underneath you." Finally he was upright, in a manner of speaking. One side was up, the other was leaning heavily on Scully as they staggered to the sofa. Scully gently eased Mulder down, but even this movement elicited a litany of very explicit adjectives. "Shit Scully. Pain meds. Now." His face was screwed up in a picture of agony. "Wait there Mulder, my bag's in the trunk of the car. I'll be right back." And she was gone. Wait there Mulder. As if there was a choice in this? Well he wanted her attention and now he guessed he had it. He moved a little to the right. Fuck! Just sit still, wait for Scully. A couple more pills or a jab in the hip and all this will just be a memory. "Okay Mulder, I'll have you feeling as good as new " He didn't hear her come back. Hm, must have passed out for a couple of minutes. "Umm." Pause. "Uh, Mulder. Looks like I'm out of pain pills." "That's okay, give me a shot. Anything's gotta be better than this" "Ummm. I'm out of needles too." Shit. Now what? There was no way he could put up with this pain. "I do have something else though that will take away the pain and it works a lot faster than pills and needles, but you'll have to take it internally." Thank God. "Sure fine, just give it to me. If it's gonna taste bad can I take it with juice?" Mulder asked, shifting slightly trying to find some relief. "It doesn't taste bad. In fact it doesn't taste at all. You don't take it by mouth." Scully replied. "Well if you're out of needles and I don't swallow it, how the hell am I supposed to take it?" Mulder asked, irritation hanging from his words. "Remember a few years ago, when we were chasing that EBE across the country? And you caught a flight where you tied up all the airline phones for a few hours?" "Yes?" Just what exactly was her point. "And you know how that Japanese business man told you to stick some sushi where the sun don't shine?" "Ye..es?" "That's where I'm going to put your pain medication." Scully answered, not meeting her partners gaze. "The hell you are!" Mulder replied, horrified. "Mulder don't be such a baby. I'm a doctor remember and I've seen your naked butt more times than I can count." Scully reasoned. "Seeing my naked butt, WHEN I am unconcious is one thing Scully. Sticking something INSIDE my naked butt is something else. And it ain't gonna happen!" Damn straight it wasn't gonna happen. Then something else happened and all his resolve flew out the window. He sneezed again. "AAAAAARRRRRHHHHHH! SHIT! FUCK!" "Give it to me Scully. Now!" "To save you some dignity Mulder: Do you think you can make it to the bathroom? You can do this yourself you know, I don't have to see a thing." "Yes. Yes. I can make it to the bathroom. Just give me a hand up will you?" Mulder reached out his hand. Together they got him to his feet and he made his way gingerly to the bathroom. A few minutes later a very pale, very unhappy looking Mulder emerged from the bathroom. As he moved towards Scully a sudden look of shock mixed with terror appeared on his face. He stopped dead and stared at his partner, his expression almost pleading. Then he sneezed. "AAAAARGhhhh!" Once he was able to straighten he took another step towards Scully. The 'terror' appeared again. Then he coughed. "AAARGH! Cough! AARRRGH! Cough! AAAARRGH!" HE grabbed at his back to try and cushion the impact as another round of coughing hit him. "Cough! Cough! Cough! AARGH! AAARRGH! FUCK!" He held his breath until he turned purple but nothing, nothing at all was going to stop his body from expelling the irritation by coughing. "COUGHAAAARGHHCOUGHCOUGHCOUGHCOUGHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARHH!" He'd had enough. It was time. He thought with a little luck he might have made it to 50 or maybe even 60. Fathered a couple of kids, bought a house in the suburbs even. But now he knew that was not to be. His time had come. And he was soooo ready. God take me now he begged silently. He hadn't even realized it but he was on his knees and what's more he must have voiced his desire to die because Scully was next to him giving him the full benefit of her doctorly knowledge. "You are not going to die Mulder. You have a pulled muscle and the pain meds will kick in soon and this will all just seem like a bad dream. Now get up, I'm going to put you in my bed." Scully informed him as she tugged on his arm. Just my dumb luck he moaned to himself. Scully is finally taking me to bed and there's not a damn thing I can do about it. Shit! Why did I even get up this morning? Slowly and carefully they made it to the bedroom. Actually he didn't feel too bad, it was only when he coughed or sneezed that the pain felt like his back was being ripped open. "Do you need any help undressing?" Scully asked, trying valiantly to hold back the smirk she could feel spreading across her face. "No thankyou. I think I would like to salvage what little dignity I have left if you don't mind." He replied, reaching up to undo his buttons. "I'll leave you to it then." Scully said and left him alone to undress. He climbed into bed and settled down under the covers, sighing as his body sunk into the soft mattress. He nuzzled his head into the pillow breathing in Scully's scent. The familiar smell of her hair conditioner lingered on the pillow. Oh God No! The fragrance was irritating his nose, another sneeze was on the way. He squeezed his eyes shut and grabbed at the offending muscle in his back, anything to lessen the inevitable pain. Ah..A..A.........Phew! False alarm. ARCHOOOO! "AAAAAAAAARRRRRGHHH!" "Mulder?" When he was able to focus his eyes again it was on Scully's panicked face. "Shit that hurt Scully." . "Why don't I put the TV on for you? It might take your mind off things." She offered. "Thanks. And can you pass me the remote? Oh and an iced tea would be great." Take away the pain in his back and this was more like he'd imagined the evening would go. Scully taking care of him in his hour of need. "Right Mulder, I'll be back in a minute." Poor Scully. He'd been so wrapped up in his own pain that he'd forgotten all about her toothache. She was speaking through clenched teeth again. Maybe she should have one of those pain killers he'd just had. "Here's your iced tea Mulder, don't choke on it." Always looking out for his welfare. He sure was a lucky man to have a partner like her. "Hey Scully check out this guy on the TV." "What are you watching?" "Some old reruns from the eighties, 'Scarecrow and Mrs King'. Did you ever watch that show?" Mulder asked as he turned up the volume a notch. "If I did I don't remember." Scully replied, somewhat nonplussed by the whole thing. "Look at the guy on the show. He's supposed to be some kind of Secret Agent and he's teamed up with a housewife. You can tell he's got the hots for her but won't admit it." "Really?" Scully stifled a yawn. "Look at him Scully, he's such a wuss. The bad guy got one punch in and he's carrying on like he's just gone through a round with Mike Tyson. He's so obvious. Anyone can see he's just trying to get some attention from Mrs King." Mulder turned to Scully, waiting for her to agree with him. What he saw was a classic Scully 'look'. Her eyebrow had disappeared up into her hairline, her lips were slightly parted as if she wanted to say something but had forgotten how to speak. "What Scully?" She just shook her head. "Nothing Mulder. Nothing at all. If you want anything I'll be out in the kitchen" "Scully don't go." She stopped and turned to look at her partner. He sounded so helpless and child like when he asked her to stay. Maybe he wasn't kidding when he said the earlier coughing fit had frightened him? How could she be angry with him? Guilt flooded through her as she realized how selfish she'd been. After all, who would take care of him if she didn't? The kitchen could wait, she'd sit with him for awhile. "What is it Mulder?" She asked gently, trying to make up for her earlier attitude. "The remote. It's dropped under the bed. Do you think you could get it for me before you go?" 1...2..3...If she could just make it to ten with out killing him he might have a chance of survival..4...5.. "Scully. I've been watching you all night. Don't try and be brave on my account. If your tooth is hurting you that much maybe you should try that pain killer you gave me. It really works, my back feels a lot better." "My tooth? Mulder what the hell are you talking about?" This was too much. "See, there you go again. Look how clenched up your jaw is. I thought you must have a toothache." "My teeth are fine." "Oh good. In that case after you get the remote could I have some thing to eat? Ah, not the soup though, wouldn't want to take any chances with food poisoning." ......6.....7....8.....9 "Sure Mulder, I'll just go and load my weap....um I mean put something in the microwave." And then a thought occured to her. Maybe there was a way they could both get some peace. "You take it easy Mulder. How does a nice hot chocolate sound?" "Perfect. Can I have some marshmallows too? Got any pink ones? And some cookies." "Anything for you Mulder, I'll be right back." There had to be some advantages to be being a doctor, right? All the time and effort she'd invested in Mulder could allow her this one little what? Indiscretion? She preferred to think of it as an act of humanity. Mulder was in pain and discomfort, how would he get a good night's sleep? And surely she had the right to preserve her own sanity, didn't she? This argument was going around and around in her head when a noise from the bedroom decided it for her. "AR..CHOOO! AAAAAAARGH SCULLY!" "Coming Mulder." He was right, her jaw was beginning to ache. She rummaged around in her medical bag and found exactly what she needed. Valium. YES! Two for Mulder, one for her. No, that wasn't necessary. Three for Mulder. She crushed the tablets and stirred them into the chocolate. A pang of guilt hit her. "SCULLLEEEEEE!" And quickly disappeared. ************************************************ "Here Mulder." She handed him the drink. "Thanks. Scully I need another pillow. The quilt keeps fluffing up and blocking the TV screen." "Not a problem Mulder." Scully found a spare pillow in the closet. She squeezed it and tossed it in her hands, just getting the feel of it, imagining it silencing her partners next whinge, then caught herself just in time. What was she thinking? Maybe the sedative wasn't exactly ethical but for all Mulder's manic behaviour and dark thoughts she was fairly certain he wasn't suicidal. And she had better things to do with her life than sit behind bars on a murder charge! The sedative was definately the way to go. "Sit up a bit Mulder so I can get this behind your head." "Ah shit, ow, ah!" Mulder moaned as he pushed himself upright, then collapsed gratefully into the soft pillows. "How's the chocolate?" Scully asked. "It's hot, I burnt my tongue." Not hot enough apparently, speech was still possible. "And where's the marshmallows?" "Im out of them ." She snapped. Not long now she reminded herself. He slurped at the chocolate. He was beginning to think her focus had shifted from him. She seemed distracted. He eyed Scully over the rim of the cup. Oh no, it was okay. She was smiling sweetly at him. He grinned back and continued to sip. By the time he'd finished he was feeling pretty damn tired. All that coughing, sneezing and pain must have taken it out of him. He'd just close his eyes for a minute before reminding Scully about the cookies. ******************************* He looked so cute when he slept, angelic even, but after tonight she knew THAT was only an impression. Scully removed the empty cup from Mulder's lifeless fingers and checked his pulse, just in case. She leaned over and turned offthe bedside lamp, and lowered the volume of the television. "Goodnight Mulder," she whispered. "Sleep tight." And please, no bed bugs biting him and waking him up. She prayed to herself The End. Feedback is most welcome.